Find the Right Therapist blog post


It’s a daunting task to research and choose a therapist or counselor. If you have not been referred, as many of my clients have been, you face the task of finding a therapist on your own. I want you to be as confident as you can be, before you contact me, that I may be able to help you. So my website and this blog has been created with you in mind – to help you decide if I might be a good fit for you, and if you want to call me or set an appointment with me. As you read this page, jot down some notes and your questions. And visit the website page for additional help in selecting a therapist.


You may be looking for a counselor or therapist right now for one of two primary reasons. The first is that you are dealing with individual, marital, couple, or family relationship concerns, infidelity, symptoms of depression, anxiety, substance abuse or other addictive behavior, or you believe you lack self-esteem. The second reason may be because of some recent or maybe not-so-recent event or change that has occurred in your life. In response to what you are dealing with in either of these two, or perhaps other categories I did not mention, you are likely to have been experiencing any number of uncomfortable thoughts and emotions. The phrase many people use that prompts them to begin their search is “I need to talk to someone.”

Even without meeting or knowing you, it is precisely BECAUSE you are seeking professional help to deal with the discomfort you are experiencing that I do not assume you have some major underlying pathology, illness, or sickness. Because you are reading this, I already know you have the ability to persevere, and that you are likely to have become weary of persevering with limited or no change in your circumstance, your thoughts, or your feelings.

You probably know someone like me. I am a people person – friendly and engaging. I naturally like people. I am curious. I want to understand. So I ask questions. I listen to the answers. But I am not judgmental. By listening to you with my ears, mind, and heart, and clarifying with my education, training, and clinical and life experience, I will educate, counsel, and advise you – and partner with you – in formulating a plan and developing skills and techniques to reduce or eliminate the distress you feel about the problems you have sought my help to address. As this occurs, you will experience more confidence in yourself, and an increase of hope, happiness, success, purpose, and meaning in your life.

I have been able to help and inspire many of my clients to reduce and even overcome symptoms associated with individual, marital, couple, and family relationship worries and distress – such as poor communication, lack of affection, closeness and connection, and lack of trust – depression, anxiety, lack of respect and self-confidence, behaviors that seem impossible to understand or change, but that keep you from obtaining what you want from your life, compulsive behaviors, and addiction/substance abuse (Visit Therapy That Works page).

I have great respect for the process of professional helping – counseling and therapy, including advising, and coaching. Trusting the process is likely to yield an outcome that makes symptoms and problems more manageable, or perhaps even eliminates them altogether. I am thoughtful and careful to insure that you are able to clearly identify, address and resolve your worries and concerns. I am an experienced marriage therapist and couples counselor, and skilled at integrating my education, research and clinical experience, specific training in relationship counseling, and my life experience in helping couples of all types with relationship concerns to partner with each other to make needed changes in their relationships. I know how couples and families become distressed, how they perpetuate their distress, and how they can alter the patterns that perpetuate that distress. I am experienced in assisting couples and families of all types and definitions alter those distress-perpetuating patterns, and improve their ability to communicate with each other, like each other more, and adapt to ever evolving needs and circumstances.

Regardless of race, ethnicity, gender, religion, or sexual identity or preference, whether you are single, married, considering marriage, not considering marriage, engaged, cohabiting, separated, or divorced, I can help you zero in on the real issue that creates discomfort and distress for you. I can help you be a positive influence to change the things you can and solve the solvable problems, accept what you cannot change and adapt to it, without anxiety, anger, resentment, or depression, So if you’re stuck in the gap between the way things are and the way you want them to be, I can help you get unstuck.